Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Family Guy Cookie Monster Rehab

This is for my friend Jason and his son Jacob...They love Cookie Monster!

Monday, September 29, 2008

Choke

In today’s society, we have a lot of addicts out there. Some trying to better themselves, some not caring if they better themselves and then we have the ones that don’t know if they have a problem. The most common addictions are alcohol and drug use. One of the least known addicts is the addiction to sex. Sex addicts are out there and they have a story. One of these stories is Choke by Chuck Palahniuk.

Choke was made into a movie by director and screenwriter Clark Gregg (Ironman) in his directorial debut. Chuck Palahniuk was also involved in the screenwriting. Sam Rockwell (Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy) takes on the lead role of Victor Mancini. Anjelica Huston (The Life Aquatic) plays Victor’s mother, Ida Mancini. Victor’s best friend Denny is played by Brad William Henke (Hollywoodland, North Country). Kelly MacDonald (Trainspotting, No Country For Old Men) plays Dr. Paige Marshall, Ida’s doctor. Director Gregg also plays the role of Lord High Charlie.

Choke starts off with Victor Mancini (Rockwell) and Denny (Henke), who are admitted sex addicts, at the weekly sex addicts anonymous meeting. Victor who is really only there so he can hook up with sex addicts who relapse. He loves the action of orgasming because everything in his world goes quiet and everything then is beautiful. Instead of being in the meeting Victor is hooking up with Nico (Paz de la Huerta) in the bathroom. This is their weekly meeting. Victor and Denny also work in colonial America as historical interpreters or “tour guide”, which he hates to be called. Their jobs are not taken as seriously as it is by everyone else, especially Lord High Charlie (Gregg). Lord High Charlie is always trying to find someway to get them into trouble and eventually banish them a.k.a. fire them. Denny is usually ending up in the stocks because he is either not dressed in colonial times attire or bring in modern things to work and gets caught with them. Victor also has a side scam going. He goes to restaurants and chokes on food in order for people to save him. This way the people feel like they are heroes for saving him and also the have the need to look out for him and send him money to make sure he is still doing ok. The reason he does this is because his mother Ida (Huston) is in a mental hospital and he has to come up with the monthly healthcare funding. Ida doesn’t even know who Victor is and believes that he is always some dead lawyer. One day while visiting his mother, Victor meets Dr. Paige Marshall (MacDonald) and immediately wants to have sex with her. Dr. Marshall wants no part of it based on the fact that Victor has slept with most of the nursing staff. Victor has a knack for getting women to sleep with him and when he sees one he has slept with he has flashbacks of the encounter.

Choke as a movie was extremely well done and kept to the book very nicely. There were parts that were omitted, like more of what it is to be a sex addict, but I can see why it was left out. Gregg and Palahniuk hit the point of the book that make you go “Oh my god” and that’s what makes this movie great. This will hopefully end up as another culy classic like Fight Club. Sam Rockwell played Mancini perfectly and shows that he can be a good comic actor. If you liked him in the movie you should see him in Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind. There is some fucked up parts in this movie, but there is definitely some good laughs. I do recommend to read the book. Either before or after you see this movie because there is parts that were left out that are good reads.

Choke gets a 4 out of 5.

I recommend if you enjoy a good movie that has some laughs and is somewhat raunchy to it to see this in the theater, if not this is definitely a must own on dvd.

Fight Club-Calvin & Hobbes Theory

Here's an interesting theory by Gavin P. Chow as posted on metaphilm.com/philm.php?id=29_0_2_0

Fight Club

The Return of Hobbes
Hobbes is reborn as Tyler to save "Jack" (a grown-up Calvin) from the slough of un-comic despair.

In the film Fight Club, the real name of the protagonist (Ed Norton’s character) is never revealed. Many believe the reason behind this anonymity is to give "Jack" more of an everyman quality. Do not be deceived. "Jack" is really Calvin from the comic strip Calvin and Hobbes. It’s true. Norton portrays the grown-up version of Calvin, while Brad Pitt plays his imaginary pal, Hobbes, reincarnated as Tyler Durden.
Part I: The Hobbes-Tyler Connection

Picture this: a hyper, self-absorbed child initially concocts an imaginary friend as the ideal playmate, to whom more realistic qualities soon become attributed. This phantasm becomes a completely separate personality, with his own likes, dislikes, and temperament—and the imaginer and the imagined clash and argue constantly, though remaining fast friends. This pattern continues to the point where the child begins to perceive what was originally mere fantasy to be reality.

Just as Calvin has an imaginary jungle-animal friend named Hobbes, whom everyone else believes to be nothing but a stuffed toy, "Jack" in Fight Club has an imaginary cool-guy friend named Tyler, whom no one but Jack can see.

In both cases, the entity that began as the ideal companion soon took on a more realistic, three-dimensional quality. In other words, they became real. This is evident in that both Hobbes and Tyler also began to function as scapegoats for their creators. For instance, consider that Calvin often blames broken lamps and other assorted household mischief on Hobbes, and that Jack is inclined to believe that Fight Club and other various anti-society mischief is brought about by Tyler, not himself. Calvin claims Hobbes pounces on him every day after school; Jack believes Tyler beats him up next to 40 kilotons of nitroglycerin in a parking garage—the list goes on and on. The relationships between the two sets of friends are the exact same. Is this mere coincidence?
Hobbes

"There are eight rules of Fight Club."

Filling in the time-gap between Calvin and Jack, we can imagine the story as something like this: Once Calvin reaches the hostile environment known as the seventh grade, the constant teasing from the other students and the frustrated concern of his parents finally becomes too much, and a reluctant, disillusioned Calvin is finally forced to grow up, or at least begin to. This decision is sealed by one of the hardest things young Calvin will ever have to do in his life: un-imagine Hobbes, an act which to Calvin is essentially no different from murder. After being Calvin’s best friend for over a decade, Hobbes is packed away in a box, or tossed carelessly into a garbage bag, perhaps even stuffed under the same bed that once contained so many monsters. This is all, of course, very painful for Calvin, so much so that he represses it all in shame. Little does Calvin suspect that while he is busy growing up, deciding what "dinette set defines him as a person," Hobbes is also maturing in the recesses of his mind, waiting to be unleashed at an appropriate time.

It’s worth noting that during these twenty or so years, Hobbes never bears a grudge against Calvin nor wishes any ill upon him. Hobbes, remembering the depth of their past friendship, does not hate Calvin but rather hates the society that made Calvin put him away. Hobbes, residing in Calvin’s mind, sees and experiences all that Calvin does—and truly despises all of it. He witnesses a bright, superbly imaginative kid (with a genius-level vocabulary) reduced to nothing more than another nameless cog. Fighting off the tears wept for his conventionalized pal, Hobbes resolves to set Calvin free, paying special attention when Calvin idly looks up homemade-napalm recipes on the Internet.

Flash forward to the timeframe depicted in Fight Club. Calvin/Jack has reached an all-time low. He has done everything society has told him to do but is completely void of happiness. Hobbes, newly adjusted as "Tyler Durden" (after all, grown-up Calvin would no longer accept a jungle animal walking, talking, and eating canned tuna), re-enters Calvin/Jack’s life, determined to show Calvin everything he’s done wrong, whether he likes it or not.
Hobbes and the transmogrified Calvin

Tyler to Jack: "I look like you wanna look, I fuck like you wanna fuck, I’m smart, capable, and most importantly, I’m free in all the ways you wish you could be."

Calvin has always idolized Hobbes. In Weirdos From Another Planet, he dresses up like a tiger and attempts to live in the woods. Like Hobbes, Tyler is cool, collected, and incredibly cerebral. Given this evidence, one can conclude that Tyler is Hobbes, reincarnated after being trapped inside Calvin/Jack’s brain for so many years. Just as Calvin is Jack, Hobbes is Tyler.
Part II: Marla Singer—Avatar of Susie Derkins?

Somewhere between the end of high school and beginning of college, uptight, grade-obsessed Susie Derkins lost her way. The pressure to get good grades, the pressure to succeed, simply became too much for her, and she snapped.
Marla ponders her previous life as Susie Derkins

Marla remembers the girl she used to be.

Free from the protective bonds of her parents’ guidance and the bland safety of her suburban home, Susie loses her moral bearings entirely and sinks into a dark, seamy, grim world of sex, drugs, and eccentric Albert-Einstein-like hair. Her transformation is so complete that she no longer even remotely resembles the upright citizen that her parents and society wanted her to be: thus, she changes her name.

Like Calvin, Susie has become a misfit, one of society’s lost lambs. It is for this reason that she soon finds herself frequenting support groups such as "Remaining Men Together." Fate has brought her back to Calvin, whom she probably spurned back in junior high. But the two have changed so much that they no longer recognize each other!

The pink dress Marla wears in one scene slightly resembles something that "Binky Betsy," Susie’s favorite childhood doll, once wore: the doll that Calvin stole and attempted to ransom. While Calvin and Susie mostly teased and tortured each other, Hobbes was infatuated with the raven-haired beauty. Accordingly, Jack despises Marla, whereas Tyler takes an *ahem* sort of interest in her (definitely inappropriate for the Sunday Funnies).

When we are first introduced to Marla, she is but a tumor on Jack’s slowly deteriorating world. She is disenfranchised, morbid, socially apathetic—and Jack despises her because she is a mirror image of himself, his own female double. On the other hand, Calvin hates Susie because she is his exact opposite: Bright, obedient, demure—the unruly Calvin has every reason to hate her. However, certain strips definitely infer that Calvin has somewhat of a crush on Susie, and some even imply that Susie shares these latent feelings. But as a cootie-fearing grade-schooler, Calvin may only express these strange feelings through attention-getting antagonisms such as constant snowballs to the head, ransoming her dolls—and through his separate, conveniently more mature other personality—Hobbes.

Unlike Calvin, Hobbes has never been bashful about showing his affection for Susie. Calvin’s imaginary tiger-friend has called her a "cutie," worn swim jams to impress her ("Girls flip for guys in jams"), and even claimed he would betray their club’s secret code if she gave him a tummy rub (which is one of the key differences between Tyler and Hobbes). Naturally, all of this confuses and frustrates Calvin beyond words, even though Hobbes is really nothing more than a product of his own mind! And though Hobbes and Susie never consummated their love for each other (he’s a stuffed tiger and she’s a kid, you sicko!) this is, of course, the exact same deranged love-triangle that is shared between Jack, Tyler, and Marla, or at least a natural progression thereof. Perhaps Marla puts up with Jack/Tyler’s apparent nonsense for so long, because it’s the sort of thing she became used to as a child? And perhaps, in the end, Jack finds solace in Marla because it’s the exact same connection he should’ve made long ago, in his suburban youth. A connection that may have saved them both.
Part III: GROSS—Precursor of Fight Club
Hobbes in a tree sneering at Calvin

In a scene eerily reminiscent of Fight Club, Hobbes blithely informs a sulking Calvin that he decides his own level of involvement in G.R.O.S.S.

When you boil it down, the Fight Club that Jack and Tyler start is really just an odd sort of boys’ club—no ovaries allowed—where men can be men, and the so-called stronger of the sexes can take solace in the fact that, even in our politically correct times, some exclusivities of manhood still remain. (As a side note, imagine how much more controversy the movie would have generated if it involved scenes of men fighting women on equal ground!)

And clubs like this, of course, have their beginnings in backyards, tree houses, and garages all over America. Not surprisingly, Calvin started such a club when he was six years old. Little did anyone realize that he would construct another one much later in his life, again with the aid of an imaginary friend. For just as Calvin, Hobbes, and Susie have dark future versions in Jack, Tyler, and Marla respectively, G.R.O.S.S. (Get Rid Of Slimy girlS) has the same in Fight Club.

G.R.O.S.S. shares the following characteristics with Fight Club:

* Both have catchy names (although the "slimy" part of G.R.O.S.S. is redundant, otherwise it doesn’t spell anything).
*
Calvin and Hobbes fight club
Both are co-run by a friendless male and his imaginary companion (Calvin is Tyrant and Dictator-for-Life; Hobbes is President and First Tiger).
* Both are exclusively male organizations, although Fight Club’s membership is considerably larger.
* Along with that, all members of both organizations are very loyal.
* The leaders of both organizations constantly engage in fisticuffs (but only in G.R.O.S.S. does a member receive a demerit for biting).
* And in said fights, in both organizations, there is only one fight at a time!
* Both are supposedly very secretive (though Jack never tells his mother about Fight Club).
* At least one leader of both organizations is fond of giving speeches (though Calvin never uses the term "space monkey").

G.R.O.S.S. and Fight Club both wreak havoc on their respective neighborhoods (G.R.O.S.S.’s target is considerably more focused, i.e., Susie). Clearly, the roots of Fight Club can be seen in G.R.O.S.S. Calvin shows his penchant for such male-oriented, destructive organizations. Also, just like cardboard-box-time-machines and water-gun-transmogrifiers, G.R.O.S.S. was likely created as an escape, a release—as, of course, was Fight Club.
Part IV: Moe Develops Karmic Bitch-Tits
Jack and Moe/Robert Paulson

Moe secretly seeks atonement for past sins.

Robert "Moe" Paulson, Calvin’s grade-school bully, becomes a six-time weight-lifting champion, and somewhere along the line develops large man-boobs as a result of testicular cancer. This of course leads him to his support group, where he is shocked to find Calvin.

Moe greatly regrets his bullying days, but, too ashamed to reveal his true identity to Calvin, he instead offers his ample bosom for him to cry on, as a measure of retribution.
Part V: The Root of Evil

Although we’ve already learned of the fates of Hobbes, Susie, and Moe, there are a couple of other people important to Calvin that are missing. People that are even more integral to his development than (arguably) Hobbes: his parents. Mr . . . uhm . . . , and Mrs . . . uh. . . . Okay, so they don’t have names. But then again, there is no need to know them. Because in the comic strip, they’re not supposed to be important characters in their own right. They only matter in regards to how Calvin is directly effected by them; an effect which, by the time of the film, doesn’t seem to have been very positive. From what "Jack" mentions, he’s not exactly close to his parents, particularly his dad, on whom he seems to pin many of his problems. And this matches perfectly with the relationship depicted in the comic, as well as with what happened afterwards (in Part I).
Calvin's Dad

Calvin’s dad seems to have done quite a number on his son. As stated, it was probably at his urging that Calvin "grew up," that is, finally started to conform to society’s rules, which was the death of Hobbes. Of course, his father wasn’t without his playful side—good-naturedly teasing Calvin at every opportunity—but perhaps this is why "Jack" resents him so much. Maybe after Jack reached the end of his dutiful journey, only to find emptiness, he thought back to the day his father told him that the sun sets down somewhere in Arizona every night. "Maybe," thought Calvin, "maybe ALL of it’s been just another one of Dad’s cruel jokes."

In the "bathtub" scene of Fight Club, "Jack" and Tyler discuss their woeful parents. In this scene, crucial information is revealed, as well as some inconsistencies. "Jack" claims his father left when he was six, an age when Calvin’s dad was obviously still around, but this statement is contradicted soon after, when Tyler mentions his own dad telling him to get married when he was thirty, to which "Jack" responds, "mine said that too." The self-pitying "Jack" is most likely seeking to garner additional sympathy from his newfound friend by making his childhood sound worse than it actually was.
Hobbes scheming

But even more interesting is Tyler’s hostility towards his father: when "Jack" asks him who he would fight, if he could fight anyone, he answers, "I’d fight my father." But, since Tyler is only a figment of Jack’s imagination, we can only assume he’s referring to Jack’s father. And while this hatred would only make sense given that the two are sharing the same brain, why is it that Tyler seems to hate Jack’s father even more vividly than "Jack" himself does? Maybe it’s because Tyler hasn’t forgotten who’s ultimately responsible for the un-imagining that took place years before . . . maybe he’s still not too happy about it . . . and maybe he’s got some pretty good ideas for revenge.

The role of Calvin’s father in all of this is no small one. Other than to "save" Calvin, it’s entirely possible that Tyler’s real motivation for taking down civilization is simply to get back at Calvin’s father. For by destroying the society that forced Calvin into repressing Hobbes, he’s also destroying the society that Calvin’s father, after all, epitomizes. And this of course allows Hobbes an indirect measure of revenge.
Part VI: Calvin—"I Am Jack’s Lost Youth"
Calvin-Jack

Although the personality differences between Calvin in the comic strip and Calvin in the movie are pretty large, it can be explained as easily as taking Id and introducing him to Superego ("Jack" actually seems to have sort of a Super-Superego). Nearly all people go through the same thing when first confronted with the crushing grind of reality. But, as they say, the bigger they are, the harder they fall—and in terms of imagination and dreams, Calvin was a giant.

Still, it’s not as though common traits between Calvin-Calvin and Jack-Calvin can’t be identified at all. Besides a preference for imaginary friends over real ones, and an inability to express affection for girls, Calvin has never done well when forced to play by any sort of rules. Take, for instance, his utter inability in any sort of organized sport, compared to his unbridled joy while playing the make-it-up-as-you-go-along "Calvinball." Furthermore, even at age 6 Calvin never exactly thrived in stifling, authoritarian establishments (i.e., school), and he’s always had clashes with authority figures since the strip began (his parents, the doctor, his teacher, Rosalyn)—which actually may have initially planted the seeds for Tyler. Beyond that, his excellent vocabulary and way with words are still with him in the voice-over narration of Fight Club, and his rampant materialism that started with mail-order propeller-beanies ends with yin-yang shaped tables. As for the differences, they can be credited to the demoralizing effect of reality.
Calvin-Jack in the mirror

In the end, Calvin’s involvement with Fight Club and return of Hobbes can be boiled down to two words: "Personal Responsibility." For although Fight Club and Project Mayhem were both mostly Tyler’s doing, by the end of the movie, Jack readily accepts his own part of the blame, as Tyler is his creation. And by doing so, he also accepts responsibility for the undesirable condition of his own life—his father may have pushed him, but Calvin himself was the one who chose to obey. It is through this newfound self-accountability that Calvin/Jack is able to take control of his own life at last. As skyscrapers flash and crumble in the background, and blood oozes from the bullet hole in his head, Calvin says that he is "okay." And we are apt to believe him.
Part VII: Conclusion

Calvin’s world in the comic strip is pure, romanticized idealism, whereas in the movie, he lives in gray, bleak reality. Within the safety of the panel, Calvin is perpetually six years old, terrible things can never happen, and no matter how crazy a stunt he pulls, everything always returns to status quo. Because of this, our hero is free to do as he wishes, free to chase his dreams as wildly as he desires, never having to worry about tomorrow because there essentially will never be one—unless it’s part of a continuing storyline. This makes the reality of Fight Club all the bleaker, because it depicts what happens when you take someone weaned on dreams and limitless possibilities and jam him into a cramped cage confined by rules and regulations. It probably only took poor Calvin a few years in the adult world (or growing-up world) to fully make the sad change.

This transition from gleeful Calvin to dull "Jack" is not uncommon. Little Nemo became a banker, Peter Pan became a lawyer, and Garfield was caught and butchered by the chef of a Chinese restaurant. (One exception is Charlie Brown, who from all indications was mentally middle-aged at the time of his birth.)

The moral of the story is that reality bites, kiddies. Calvin and Hobbes in Fight Club are proof of this sad, sad truth.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Death Star Canteen Movie

Eddie Izzard Legos

Death Star Canteen


Cake Or Death?


James Bond


Do You Have A Flag?


Moon Landing

What is going on?

I was on itunes checking out some movie trailers and I have to say that some of the newer movies coming out are borderline dvd worthy. With the exception of Quantum of Solace, Star Trek and a few others this fall for going to the movies is going to be a bust.
I've actually seen a lot of movies going straight to dvd and its sad. Why can't people come up with something new and exciting. Lets not make a sequel or a remake of a movie, make something laugh out loud funny.
A couple movies that I will most likely see in the theaters are:
Quantum of Solace - The new James Bond
Four Christmases
Star Trek
Eagle Eye

I am thinking about seeing the movie Miracle at St. Anna in the theater bc it looks somewhat interesting.
I definitely can't wait for the real-life action G.I. Joe movie to come out. Still waiting on a trailer, but I'm stoked that Ray Park, who played Darth Maul (and if you don't know Maul you need some serious movie help), will be playing Snake Eyes, who happens to be my favorite G.I. Joe. Storm Shadow is my favorite Cobra.

Well that's about all for this posting.
Oh yeah I'm going to go see Choke tonight. Its Chuck Palahniuk's second book to be turned into a movie (Fight Club was the other).

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Rage Against The Machine @ The Republican National Convention





Paerl Jam Ticket Contest

Verizon Wireless Amphitheater held a contest for Pearl Jam tickets. Create a short story using at least 20 Pearl Jam song titles. This was my entry.

The way things happen in a young mans life are not always the way they are planned. Their parent look forward to them going to college getting good grades and getting a career, but nothing as it seems can be that simple. Here is the story of a young black man named Jeremy. Jeremy was not your everyday student, but he got good grades and tried to keep his nose clean. He woke up every morning and thanked god that he was alive. He was very popular with his peers and was the star wide receiver of the football team. Jeremy’s only flaw was that his best friend growing up, Tyson was a gang banger in the group calling themselves All or None. Tyson liked to get into trouble and Jeremy’s smooth talking usually got them out of it. Tyson’s nickname was Animal, because when he got into a fight it was like a caged animal was released. Tyson who was trying to earn his stripes with the gang decided that Jeremy and himself should go on a road trip. Jeremy being the better man and knowing that Tyson would wind up in major trouble, said yes to going. As they were driving up and down the coastline, Jeremy was getting an urge to stop and get something to snack on. So they made a stop in this backwoods town. Jeremy and Tyson went into a little convenient store. The was and elderly woman behind the counter in a small town Jeremy though, how quaint. Tyson had other plans. Tyson walked up to the woman, pulled out his .45 glock and told the woman to empty the register. Jeremy froze not knowing what to do. The woman emptied the register and gave the money to Tyson. Tyson then shot the woman in the head, blood splattered everywhere even on Jeremy. The two men started to run to the car when gunshots went off in their direction. The sheriff just happened to be pulling up as the shots were fired. Jeremy and Tyson jumped in the car and took off. The sheriff gave chase. Jeremy looking into his rearview mirror asked Tyson why would he do something like that. Tyson’s response was that he wanted to be the man of the hour with the All or None crew. They only talked about killing and he killed. He wanted the immortality of the gang and being the first person to kill out of all of them. Jeremy told Tyson this life is not for you. He had no choice though this is his life, Tyson thought. Jeremy just took a deep breath as he dove away for the sheriff that had given chase. As the chase continued, Jeremy sped through the town weaving around cars. Just as he thought they were home free, Jeremy swerved hard to the right barely missing a mother and daughter standing on the corner. The car rolled and crashed through the guardrail and dropped them deep into the woods. Jeremy tried to release himself from the mangled car, but his arm was broken and his leg pinned under the steering wheel. He looked over at Tyson, but he was already out of the car and running away. Jeremy heard the sheriff yell to his deputy; off he goes catch him he went around the bend. Jeremy was taken out of the car by paramedic’s and strapped to a gurney. He tried to tell the sheriff that it was Tyson who pulled the trigger not him. The sheriff didn’t care one bit. He was going to throw him in jail no matter what Jeremy said. Jeremy was thrown in jail. His cellmate was a man who went by the name of Ghost. Ghost was a psychotic you tried to organize a worldwide suicide, but was captured before he could initiate his plan. Ghost told Jeremy that he had found God while in prison and that it was God’s Dice that cause them to be in this place. God’s Dice was his way of saying fate. Jeremy just sat back and shook his head and realized that his life was now a life wasted. He knew he wasn’t getting out of jail. All he could think about was Tyson and how all this was his fault because he wanted to be a Glorified G.

The Dark Knight

This is not my typical review...Batman is my all-time favorite superhero and I will not give anything away on this movie. Heath Ledger was amazing as The Joker. You can not compare him to Jack's Joker they are two different types. Christian Bale again does a great job as Bruce Wayne/Batman and I love having Maggie Gyllenhaal as Rachael Dawes instead of Katie Holmes.

The Dark Knight gets a 4.8 out of 5.

SEE THIS MOVIE...ESPECIALLY IN IMAX!!!

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

It seems like the thing to do in movies today is to make sequels to the classics, even if it has been 24 years since the last installment. Fans have wanted Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull ever since the end of The Last Crusade. Indiana Jones is an icon on the big screen that just about everybody knows, so why not bring back the legendary teacher and see what kind of trouble he can get himself out of.

Steven Spielberg (First three Jones films) steps behind the camera to film this fourth installment in the life of Dr. Jones. His best friend and co-producer George Lucas (Star Wars) wrote the storyboard, while David Keopp (Spiderman, Mission Impossible) writes the screenplay. Harrison Ford (Star Wars) dons the fedora again as Dr. Henry “Indiana” Jones Jr. Karen Allen (Raiders of the Lost Arc, The Sandlot) returns as Marion Ravenwood a former love interest of Jones. Shia LaBeouf (Transformers, Disturbia) enters as Mutt Williams, a greaser/biker who is sent to find Jones. Cate Blanchett (Lord of the Rings trilogy) plays Irina Spalko, a Soviet agent who seems to has paranormal senses.

The story starts with Indiana Jones (Ford) and his friend George “Mac” McHale (Ray Winestone) being forced by Soviet Union forces, led by Irina Spalko (Blanchett), to find a crate located in Area 51. Jones shows them where the crate is by using the crate’s magnetic properties. Jones tries to escape but is double crossed by McHale. Jones eventually escapes into a atomic bomb test site and is found by the FBI. Jones goes back to work as an archeology teacher, but then learns he has been relieved of duty by the college. Jones is then found by Mutt Williams (LaBeouf), who needs Indiana’s help to find his friend Professor Oxley (John Hurt). Jones and Mutt then embark on a mission to find Oxley and Williams’ mother Mary, who was also abducted by the same people who took Oxley.

(This summary is short because I don’t want to give away too much of this movie and I want you to see it for yourself. With that said I have some thoughts and criticism. I am only doing this because I believe this movie could’ve been done better.)

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was a fantastic movie. There are some parts that did not sit well though. The whole aliens thing has been played out. Was this homage to Close Encounters of the Third Kind by Spielberg? Or was it just Lucas not knowing how to write anything else but science fiction? I just can’t believe with all of the history that is out there why do the whole aliens angle? Spielberg could’ve saved this story line for a later movie and still introduced all the new characters with a different script. All in all Indiana Jones was a great movie there was just a lot of holes left to be filled by future movies hopefully. I liked the character of Mutt, except for his hair; they seem to have a good angle on him and I loved the ending. This movie unfortunately does not exceed any of its predecessors.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull gets a 3.9 out of 5.

This is a must see on the big screen and a must own dvd.

Beatles Love by Cirque Du Soleil

While in Las Vegas I went to see the show Beatles Love by Cirque Du Soleil at the Mirage. This is the most fascinating show I have ever seen. I don't know if there are words to describe it. The music enter twined with the dancing and all to Beatles music is incredible. All I can say is that if you are a Beatles fan you have to see this show.

Beatles Love gets a 10 out of 5.

Harold and Kumar: Escape from Guantanamo Bay

When you think of movie sequels you think damn this better be better than the original and better live up to the hype also. Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay does not really do either. It doesn’t surpass the first, but its also not worse than the first. This movie is about the same two bubbling idiots just another way.

Directors Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg, who also directed the first installment, bring their crude humor and weed laced comedy back to the big screen. Harold and Kumar are agin played by John Cho and Kal Penn.

The story takes place a bout 5 minutes after Harold (Cho) and Kumar (Penn) get back from White Castle and are about to embark on a trip to Amsterdam to follow Harold’s new girlfriend Maria (Paula Garces). While on the plane to Amsterdam, Kumar gets the wild hair up his ass to try out his new invention the smokeless bong in the bathroom. Kumar doesn’t shut the door and is spotted by an older lady who think he has a bomb. Harold and Kumar are then taken down by air marshals and return to the USA. They are then dubbed terrorists by a dim-witted government official Deputy Frye (Jack Conley). Frye sends them to Guantanamo Bay as terrorists. Harold and Kumar manage to escape prison, just before they were forced to have their daily dose of a cock-meat sandwich, with actual terrorists and sneak back into the US with a bunch of Cuban refugees. Harold and Kumar then begin the journey to Texas where they have a friend they hope will help them clear their names. So let the shenanigans begin.

Just like the first movie the two boys set out to do something and get massively sidetracked in the process. Though the is a lot of one-liners, funny scenes, nudity and lewd humor its basically the same movie done a different way.

Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay gets a 2.5 out of 5.
(If you liked the first one you’ll like this one.)

This is a rental from the theatrical version, but I would suggest buying the unrated version instead, might have movie sick humor than the original. This is a laugh out loud movie.

Ironman

It seems that any and every comic book you can think of is becoming a big screen movie. With that said enter the newest in the line of Marvel comic books to be made into a movie. This is Iron Man!

Iron Man is another one of the creations to come out the the genius that is Stan Lee. Most notable though by Wu-Tang Clan member Ghostface Killah, who adopted the alias Tony Stark/Ironman. Director Jon Favreau (Made, Elf) takes on this comic book and transforms it into a blockbuster hit. Robert Downet Jr. (Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Zodiac) dawns the suit of weapons creator Tony Stark and the armor of superhero Iron Man. Terrence Howard (Crash, Hustle & Flow) plays Jim Rhodes, an Air Force liaison to Stark Enterprises and friend of Stark himself. Gwyenth Paltrow (The Royal Tenebaums, Shallow Hal) portrays Stark’s assistant Pepper Potts. The number two man at Stark Enterprises is Obadiah Stane played by Jeff Brides (The Big Lewbowski).

Tony Stark (Downey Jr.) and Jim Rhodes (Howard) are in the Middle East of show the military Stark’s new weapon that will change the face of the weapons industry. The weapon is called the Jericho and ince fired it splits apart and all the componets come back to create a devistaing blast. Terrorists ironically using Stark Enterprises’ weapons attack Afetr the demostration, Stark and his convoy of soldiers. During the attack Stark is hit in the chest with shrapnel from a missle and passes out. Stark the awakens to find out the a doctor named Yinsen (Shaun Toub) has removed some shrapnel pieces, but couldn’t get them all. Yinsen places an electromagnet into Stark’s chest so that the other pieces cannot travel towards his heart and kill him. The magnet is hooked up to a car battery. Stark builds an Ark Reactor, a tiny version of a new type of power that fuels Stark Enterprises, and places that into his chest and is to run his heart for 50 lifetimes. Stark and Yinsen are then forced to recreate the Jericho missile for the terrorists. Instead Stark builds a make-shift iron suit that he uses to escapes the terrorists and is the then found by Rhodes and the military that was looking for him. After three months of captivity, Stark returns home with a new sense of what he should be doing with his life.

Iron Man the comic book was just a b-shelf comic, b meaning it was in the shadows of the bigger comics like X-Men, Wolverine, Superman, Batman, etc., but Iron Man the movie is most definitely an A-lister. This is one of the better movies to be made out of a comic book. Favreau does a fantastic job handling the explosions, battles and storylines of Iron Man leaving nothing to speculation exect when will Tony Stark show up next (just a hint on that…check out The Incredible Hulk staring Edward Norton, coming soon). Robert Downey Jr. was born to play the role of Tony Stark. Stark has an arrogance and confidence about himself and Downey Jr. has that also.

Iron Man gets a 4.3 out of 5.

This is a must see in the theaters and a definite must own dvd.

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

When is comes to making a great musical feature, it takes a lot of dedication, hard work and desire to perform and make the feature stand out in the viewers mind. Two names you would never think of when talking about musicals are Johnny Depp and Tim Burton, you’d think a dark movie with a moral twist, but that all changes with the film Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street.

Based on the hit Broadway musical of the same name director Tim Burton (Corpse Bride, Sleepy Hollow) brings his one-of-a-kind directing skills to turn Sweeney Todd from stage to screen along with his dark, edgy and somewhat twisted shooting style. John Logan (The Aviator, Gladiator) wrote a wonderful screenplay while Stephen Sondheim, who has done a numerous amount of songs and scores for various shows and films, composes the musical score. Logan and Sondheim compliment each other very well in this tale of love and revenge. Johnny Depp (Corpse Bride, 21 Jump Street) takes on the title role of Sweeney Todd/Benjamin Barker. Helena Botham Carter (Fight Club, Corpse Bride) plays Mrs. Lovett, a meat pie baker who owns the shop under Todd’s. Judge Turpin who is portrayed magnificently by Alan Rickman (Harry Potter series). Rickman always seems to play a damn good villain. Turpin’s right hand man is Beadle Bamford played by Timothy Spall (Harry Potter series). Sacha Baron Cohen (Borat) plays Signor Adolfo Pirelli, a competitive barber.

The story takes place in London when Benjamin Barker aka Sweeney Todd (Depp) comes to town to settle a score with Judge Turpin (Rickman). Turpin wrongfully imprisoned Barker 15 years earlier so Turpin could be with Barker’s wife. Todd comes back to Fleet Street and takes up company with a meat pie baker named Mrs. Lovett (Carter). Todd and Lovett plot how to lure the judge into his shop so he can dispatch of him in his own way. To attempt to gain recognition Todd challenges a street barber named Signor Adolfo Pirelli (Cohen) to a challenge of shaving skills. Todd wins and with the win lure the judge up to his barber shop for a shave, the closest shave he’s ever given. When a young sailor bursts in a confesses his plan to steal away the judges female ward, Todd loses his chance at revenge.

Tim Burton and Johnny Depp who have now hooked up for the sixth time have again come away with a winner. Sweeney Todd is a brilliantly done musical. No voice-overs were used just to accomidate a big star who can’t sing. You can here all the stars and their little voice quirks in the songs, especially Depp and Rickman. I swear sometimes you could close your eyes and it would be Jack Sparrow singing to you.

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street gets a 4.2 out of 5.
(I might be a little biased because Burton is my favorite director and Depp is in my top 5 of actors all-time, but I gave the movie the rating it deserved.)

This is definitely a must own dvd, even if you don’t like musicals (yeah I’m talking to you Nick!). I just wish I could have seen it on the big screen.

Drillbit Taylor

How well do you remember your high school days? I bet there’s some things you can’t remember, but if had somebody pick on you I bet you still remember his/her name. That’s just what high school was. Now there’s a bodyguard who can protect you (or at least get his ass kicked instead of yours) named Drillbit Taylor.

Drillbit Taylor is a movie wriiten by Seth Rogan (Knocked Up, 40 Year Old Virgin) and Kristofor Brown (Beavis and Butt-head) and directed by Steven Brill (Little Nicky, Mr. Deeds). Staring 3 newcomers Nate Hartley, Troy Gentile and David Dorfman as 3 freshman who happen to be the obsession of the local high school bullies played by Alex Frost (Stop-Loss) and Josh Peck (Snow Day). Owen Wilson (Wedding Crashers) stars as Drillbit Taylor, a homeless awol vet, who is hired to protect the boys from the bully. Lesile Mann (Big Daddy) plays a high school teacher who falls for Taylor’s con of being a teacher.

Trying to make their high school careers something to remember best friends Wade (Hartely) and Ryan (Gentile) plot to become cool. Only on the first day they mess up by wearing the same exact shirt. Then they make an even bigger mistake by trying to help Emmit (Dorfman) from being stuffed into a locker by Filkins (Frost) and Ronnie (Peck). Filkins and Ronnie then make it their mission to harass the 3 boys everyday and make their lives a living hell. Not taking anymore the 3 boys look to hire a bodyguard. In steps DrillBit Taylor (Wilson) who agrees to protect the boys, who is a homeless vet looking to make a quick buck takes the job and has a hidden agenda to rob the boy’s houses and flee to Canada. Taylor goes undercover as a substitute teacher using the name Dr. Illbit where he catches the affection of English teacher Lisa (Mann). Doing his best to protect the boys Drillbit tries to make the bullies life hell, but all hell breaks loose.

Drillbit Taylor is a very funny movie with a lot of one-liners that will make you laugh your ass off, but has some slow spots that give you time to wonder when the next laugh is coming. Owen Wilson once again shows he can carry a semi-good movie without cameos from other big name stars.

Drill Bit Taylor get a 3.3 out of 5.

If you need a good funny date movie then see it on the big screen. This is definitely a must own dvd.

Vantage Point

Have you ever seen a movie and gone wow I wish I would of seen that happen from someone else’s point of view? Have you ever watched a movie and tried to figure out all the little details behind each character? Well if you have then you have to see Vantage Point. If you watch the show Lost, you will absolutely love this film.
Vantage

Vantage Point is a film shot from 6 peoples different points of view. Written by Barry Levy and directed by Pete Travis, these two creative minds came through to create a film worth talking about way after the film is over. They’ve got you trying to guess what is going to happen next. Starring Dennis Quaid ( The Rookie), Matthew Fox (Lost), Forrest Whitaker (Phonebooth) and William Hurt (The Village) along with a great cast make this movie about an assaination attempt on the President of the United States come to life. Quaid and Fox play secret service agents who are in Spain for the President’s (Hurt) anti-terrorism campaign. Whitaker plays an American who happens to catch most of the chaos that ensues on his video camera and tries to help bring the guilty parties to justice.

President Ashton (William Hurt) is attending a global war on terror summit in Spain. Thomas Barnes (Dennis Quaid) and Kent Taylor (Matthew Fox) are two of the Secret Service agents assigned to protect him. This is the first action that Agent Barnes has been in since he took a bullet for President Ashton six-month earlier. We really dont know if Agent Barnes is up to the challenge of protecting the President. Once at the podium, President Ashton is immediately shot twice by a rifle from a window and falls to the floor. The crowd is in shock and chaos breaks out all over, especially, when bombs begin to explode. Howard Lewis (Forest Whitaker) is an American video-taping the event to show to his children that he was actually there at this historic event. He believes that he has the picture of the man who shot the President. Agent Barnes sees the tape and has a clue to that person. Several different people witness the event, and only through their eyes do we see the truth behind the assassination attempt.

With all of the recaps of the same event over and over again Vantage Point kinda gets a little drawn out, but once the movie gets in gear you will see why all the points of view needed to be shown. This movie has great action and great twists, the only problem I have with it is that you can guess to shooter before he is revealed.

Vantage Point gets a 3.8 out of 5.

I would say if you have a hankering to see it on the big screen, then by all means see it. My advice is to wait BUY it on DVD and watch it on your big screen at home.

Superbad

It has definitely been a while since a movie could reveal the youthful exuberance of the dazed and confused era. With most of the generation X being able to relate Superbad is the movie everyone has experienced or heard about when they were younger. Superbad is a fantasically done movie that keeps you laughing throughout and has your jaw hurting once it’s finished.

Directed by Greg Mottola (Arrested Development episodes) takes this misguided youthful comedy and turns it into a cult-classic. Superbad features the Steve Carrell camp. Jonah Hill (Evan Almighty, Knocked Up) and Michael Cera play Seth and Evan two high-school seniors and life-long best friends before they go away to college. Seth Rogan (Knocked Up, 40 Year-Old Virgin) and Bill Hader (Saturday Night Live) play Officer Michaels and Officer Slater, who are really just looking for a good time. Christopher Mintz-Plasse plays the crazy Fogell/McLovin.

With high school winding down, Seth and Evan (Hill and Cera) are realizing that they are not going to college together and are having a hard time letting go of each other. They have a nerdy friend named Fogell who gets a fake ID and renames himself McLovin, a 25 year-old from Hawaii. When Seth is asked to buy alcohol for a party he has no cjhoice but to get McLovin to buy it. While purchasing the alcohol McLovin is decked as the store is robbed. Officers Michaels and Slater (Rogan and Hader) come to write out the police report. They take McLovin on a wild ride around town and Seth and Evan are forced to find other means of getting booze.

This is a funny ass movie that people can relate to about how some kids just want to be noticed and popular. With all the crazy shenanigans happening around these 3 high schoolers it’s a wonder how they ever survived high school.

Superbad gets a 4.70 out of 5.

This is a must see on the big screen.

Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix

Harry potter is one of the most recognizable names in entertainment that is out there. Be it by book, by movie or video game most people today know the name. There is also a lot of people who know the order of all the books/movies and know them by heart. Then there's the Harry Potheads, the people who see the movie opening night at midnight and also get the newest book as soon as midnight strikes.
Harry Potter and the Order of the phoenix is the fifth installment of J.K. Rowling's critically acclaimed series about a young wizard who struggles with the changing world around him.

Order of the Phoenix returns all of its original cast Daniel Ratcliffe as Harry Potter, Emma Watson as Hermione Granger, Rupert Grint as Ron Weasley, Michael Gambon as Professor Dumbledore, Alan Rickman as Snape, Gary Oldman as Sirius Black, Ralph Finnes as Lord Voldemort. New to the series is Dolores Jane Umbridge played by Imelda Staunton, and Bellatrix Lastrange done masterfully by Helana Bonham Carter.

It's another year at Hogwarts where Harry Potter and his group are forced to defend and teach themselves about the Dark Arts. With the minestry of magic putting handcuffs on the teachers and not letting the young wizards and witches practice their crafts, Harry Potter builds Dumbledore's army to take on Lord Voldemort.
This is the fith installment of the Harry Potter Series and they only seem to be getting better and better. The only wish I have is that they would stick with one director throughout the series.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix gets a 4 out of 5.

This is i must see in the theathers , especially in the IMAX experience

The Transformers

When generations as kids play with the same toys they seem to play with the same friends, then the object is to outdo your friends by getting the toy that they wanted before they get it and not let them play with it. This is what Transformers mean to me. I remember my brother always getting the ones that I wanted.

In the year 2007 Michael Bay has done it again with another blockbuster movie. There was an original Transformers movie made in 1986, which satisfied all of our young hearts content at that time. Now older and skeptical of seeing a motion picture done again about my childhood toys, I see now that movies are like toys they get better as the years go by.

Michael Bay, with the help of executive producer Steven Speilberg, hits a homerun with his portrayal of the Transformers. Starring Shia LaBeouf (Constantine, I,Robot) as Sam Witwicky, a teenager who has the get the car get the girl mentality. Megan Fox (Confessions Of A Teenage Drama Queen) stars as Mikaela Banes, a popular girl who doesn’t really know what’s good for her. Josh Duhamel (Las Vegas) is Captain Lennox, a military man who serves his country and wants to get home to his family. Jon Voight (National Treasure) plays Defense Secretary John Keller. John Turturo (Mr. Deeds) plays Agent Simmons, a secret agent whose head is bigger than his badge. Anthony Anderson (Babershop) is Glen Whitman, a computer genius. Tyrese Gibson (2 Fast 2 Furious) takes the role of USAF Tech Sargeant Epps, a military man with a good head on his shoulders for tight situations. Australian Rachael Taylor (See No Evil) portrays Maggie Madsen, a NATO computer analyst.

Transformers begins with a military base in the middle east being hacked into by and unknown helicopter who turns into a massive robot and wipes out the base. Sam (LaBeouf) this gets this car that has a lot of glitches and seems to have a mind of its own but hey it’s a 75 camero, so he’s happy with it. After Mikaela (Fox) has a falling out with her boyfriend Sam sweeps in to give her a ride home. Then Sam thinks his car has been stolen and thinks he’s losing his mind as he sees his car transform into a robot. Sam and Mikaela are then taken by his car to meet others of his kind, The Autobots. They are trying to find the energy source for their planet before the others find it, The Decepticons. The race is now on between good and evil species of this distant planet to find the life force before the other and using earth as a battleground.

Transformer is a very well directed and plotted movie. The actors all played their roles as if the roles were written especially for the actor. The only exception is John Turturo. I like the fact he’s in the movie, but before I knew he was in it I had read the book and got Doug Savant (Desperate Housewives) as Agent Simmons. The action sequences are all big and Bay-ish. No other director could have made this movie why the style that Michael Bay did.

Transformers get a 4.35 out of 5.

This is a must see on the big screen (just wish it was on IMAX). This is a definite buy.

Hannibal Rising

When you think of terror, whom do you think of? You think of someone who is cunning, knowledgeable, no cares and has a sick and twisted side. Hannibal Lecter is all of this wrapped up into one person. Lecter is probably the most recognized name in terror, just hearing his name or hearing the sucking/slurping sound that he made, makes the body cringe and has people saying stop it with their eyes closed tight and hands over their ears. We have all known from the movies/books that as a man Hannibal Lecter is a terrorfying person, but we never knew how he became this way. In comes Hannibal Rising, the story of Lecter’s childhood and pre-teen years.

Thomas Harris once again shocks the senses and writes the beginning novel that tells of young Hannibal’s trials and tribulations. Harris who also wrote Red Dragon, Silence of the Lambs and Hannibal goes back in time to the beginning with Hannibal Rising. Harris also did double duty on Hannibal Rising as in also writing the screenplay for the movie. Directed by Peter Webber, who mostly did TV directing, takes the helm in Hannibal Rising and tries to bring his own style while also bringing that shock factor of which is Hannibal Lecter. Gaspard Ulliel assumes the main role of Hannibal Lecter. Rhys Ifans (Little Nicky, The Replacements) plays the role of Grutas, the main thorn in Lecter’s young life. Dominic West (Rockstar, HBO’s The Wire) plays the role of Inspector Popil, who is in charge of catching criminals who have conducted war crimes during World War II.

The story of Hannibal Lecter begins in Lithunia during the World War II era. Lecter as a child watches Soviet troops kill his parents. Only Hannibal and his baby sister Mischa survive the event. While surviving in a forest cottage the two youngsters are taken hostage by a gang of bandits, led by Grutas (Ifans), who are out for money and also committing crimes of horrible natures. Mischa is soon sought out as the weaker of the two children and is taken away in a hunger rage by the bandits. Hannibal soon escvapes from the bandits and is put in the Soviet camp for boys, which in his early teen years he escapes. He goes to France and lives with his aunt and is soon the youngest student accepted in medical school. During his time in medical school he travels back to the cottage and finds the dog tags of the men who ate his sister. Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Hannibal Rising does a good job of showing hoe Hannibal became Hannibal the Cannibal. It doesn’t have as much gore and violence that one would think it would have. Its more of a revenge driven psychopathic rage. Its shows how, even at a young age, Lecter is a calculated mastermind and somewhat twisted genius with the way he extracts his revenge on his enemys. Hannibal Rising also left it open for there to be more to the story of a younger Hannibal Lecter.

Hannibal Rising gets a 3.75 out of 5.

This is a must own, especially if you have the other 3 movies.

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

It seems today that all that movies are doing is making sequels and trilogies. The main thing when doing this is keeping the same cast, crew and director for the whole process. This makes for a great movie and doesn’t have viewers trying to warm up to a new main character or directing style. Pirates of the Caribbean producers made sure that they did just that. The first Pirates movie sets the stage for greatness, the second then comes mediocre but maintains the allure of the first movie and then of course leaves it open for the possible final chapter, Piartes of the Caribbean: At World’s End.

Gore Verbinski (Pirates of the Caribbean 1&2) resumes his duties behind the camera and directs this third installment of a Disney World theme park ride. The camera work and cinematography that Verbinski brings is his own and keeps it consistant with the first two movies. Johnny Depp dawns the swashbuckling style that is Captain Jack Sparrow, Orlando Bloom maintains his undermining and confused Will Turner character and Keira Knightly brings the beauty and brains of Elizabeth Swann back. Bill Nighy (Shaun of the Dead) returns as Davy Jones, Geoffrey Rush (Pirates of the Caribbean 1) puts back on the big hat of Captain Barbossa and Jack Davenport (Pirates of the Caribbean 1) plays the ever-so-torn Norrington.

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End starts off with Swann and Barbossa in Singapore trying to recruit a crew, ship and most of all the map that will take them to the place that is known simply as Davy Jones’ Locker to recue Captain Jack Sparrow. With the East India Trading Company in control of the Flying Dutchman and its Captain Davy Jones, thanks to Norrington giving them Jones’ heart, he is wrecking havoc on the seas to try and rid the world of all pirates. The seas being overrun all of the pirate lord gather to make a final stand against this threat.

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End is a fantasic movie that ties up all loose ends that were left open by the second movie and leaves the possibility for a fourth if demand calls for it.

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End gets a 4 out of 5.

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End is defiantly a must own and one should see it in the theaters.

Shrek The Third

When making a trilogy a filmmaker/writer has to think what can I do to make this better than the first two movies. They need to have what the French call “I don’t know what.” Obviously the group that made Shrek the Third did not take this into consideration. Shrek the Third had its moments and funny parts but lacked the attention getting humor that ran throughout the first two Shrek films. The children will like this movie, but young adults who laughed before aren’t laughing now.

Directed by Chris Miller (Shrek, Shrek 2) Shrek the Third is not the movie he probably thought it was going to be when he signed on to film it. With an all-star cast and everyone from the first two films returning, one would think this movie would have done a better job. Mike Myers, Cameron Diaz, Eddie Murphy, Antonio Banderas, Rupert Everet all reprised their roles. Justin Timberlake, who probably only got the job because he was dating Diaz, takes on the voice of Arthur. Monty Python Alum Eric Idle leads his voice to the character of Merlin.

Shrek the Third starts with Shrek and Finoa filling in for the king and queen of Far Far Away. The king then happens to be on his deathbed and tells Shrek he wants him to be king. Shrek who doesn’t want responsibility finds out there is another who could rule and sets off to find him. As Shrek, donkey, and puss are leaving and Finoa tells Shrek that she is pregnant, which scares Shrek because he doesn’t want kids. The trio gets to their destination and finds out that the person they are looking for is Arthur (Timberlake), who is basically a loser of the high school and is picked on by Lancelot and Gwen (Gwenivere). While all this is happening Prince Charming takes over Far Far Away and sets a trap for Shrek to return too.

Shrek the Third has its funny moments and did a good job incorerating the story of king Arthur and Lancelot. Other than the same jokes told a different way this movie really does not sit well and makes you want to go to Dreamworks Studios and demand a refund.

Shrek the Third gets a 2 out of 5.

This is definitely a Rental. The only way I see spending money on it is if you have kids or you just want to complete the trilogy and if you do that wait till the movie store has it as a used copy.

Hot Fuzz

Just when the art of movie spoofing was getting old, along comes a movie that takes that notion and throws it out the window. Hot Fuzz is a fantastic movie that will have you rolling with laughter. From the creators of Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz brings that British humor that makes the movie even funnier.

Director Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead) brings his same style of chop and clip to this movie. With the 3 to 5 second montages of a scene that makes you wonder what the hell is about to happen know. Simon Pegg (Shaun of the Dead, MI 3) takes the lead again in the British cop movie. Pegg plays a overachieving special forces officer that takes his job way too seriously. Pegg and Wright were also the masterminds behind this movie. Taking the part of the sidekick is Nick Frost, who plays an officer from the country that doesn’t have too much expierence and is wowed by the presence of Pegg’s character. Bill Nighy (Underworld), Martin Freeman (Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy) make cameo roles in Hot Fuzz.

Hott Fuzz is a movie about Sergeant Nicholas Angel (Pegg) who is basically making his unit look bad because of all the arrests and accomplishments he keep getting. Not knowing how to turn off being an officer, his Chief (Nighy) sends him to the country town of Sanford, a place where his talents won’t be so embarrassing. Once in Sanford, Angel is partnered with Danny Butterman (Frost), a huge action movie fan, who hangs on every word Angel says and asks him questions about all he has done. With the help of Butterman, Angel starts to settle down in the small town. The town of Sanford which has been crime-free for years starts to having a series of murders happen. With the police force not knowing how to handle the murders Angel starts to come back to his old self.

Hot Fuzz is a movie that will have you talking about it for months to come after you see it.

Hot Fuzz gets a 4 out of 5.

This is definitely a must own. If you like Shaun of the Dead, see Hot Fuzz in the theaters.

The Prestige

Every great magic trick consists of three acts. The first act is called "The Pledge"; The magician shows you something ordinary, but of course... it probably isn't. The second act is called "The Turn"; The magician makes his ordinary some thing do something extraordinary. Now if you're looking for the secret... you won't find it, that's why there's a third act called, "The Prestige"; this is the part with the twists and turns, where lives hang in the balance, and you see something shocking you've never seen before.

The Prestige is the movie you have never seen before with all the twists and turns of a magic show. The Prestige will have you making assumption, guesses and of course how did he do that. Christopher Nolan (Batman Begins) directs this dark movie about the world of magic and the price one has to pay to be the best. The camera angles Nolan uses to show this movie are extremely well shot. You get the complete aspect of a magic show and he lets you try and see, if you can, the tricks that these magicians perform. Nolan and Jonathan Nolan also wrote the screenplay for The Prestige which is another reason the movie is so tastefully done. When a director has a hand in writing the script he has a better grasp on directing the movie. Hugh Jackman (X-Men) and Christian Bale (American Psycho, Batman Begins) play the dueling magicians Angier and Borden. Each one always trying to outdo the other and by any means necessary trying to make the other magician baffled. Michael Caine (Austin Powers in Goldmember) plays Cutter, the creator of most of the dueling magicians tricks. Scarlett Johansson (The Black Dhalia) plays Olivia, the assistant and love interest of Angier. David Bowie (If you don’t know who this then you don’t know music, Labyrinth) plays the mad scientist Tesla, who creates electrical machines for defying natural laws.

A Friendship, That Became a Rivalry...A Rivalry, That Became a Battle. As most movies are done The Prestige shows something that happens and then flashes back to show you why it did. The prestige starts with Angier (Jackman) performing a trick and with the use of a trap door falls into a tank of water which locks him in. Borden (Bale) who is under the stage at the time watches as Angier can’t get out and drowns. Borden is then placed on trial for the murder of Angier. While incarserated Borden is given Angiers diary that accounts for his time leading up to his death. The Prestige then goes back to when the two magicians were friends and protégés of Milton (played by magician Ricky Jay). When a tragedy happens and Angier’s wife (Piper Perabo, Cheaper By The Dozen) drowns in a magic trick, Angier blames Borden because he was the one who tied her wrists together for the trick. Angier with rage and payback all that matters to him does what he can to get Borden back and find out how he does his tricks. Borden’s journal is stolen by Angier, who uses it to try and better his own act and outdo Borden. What the other doesn’t know is that other is one step ahead of him. Borden is one step ahead of Angier, Angier is one step ahead of Borden and the trick is to find out who made the first step.

The Prestige takes you through the mind of two men with obsessions for their magical art and as it moves back and forth between Borden's and Angier's points of view and lives, and also forward and backward in time, to show their rise to prominence on the stage, and their growing hatred for one another that begins with one death and ends with many.

The Prestige gets a 4.5 out of 5.

This is a MUST OWN.

300

To go into a movie with no assumptions is the way we should all view a movie. Having no pre-conceived notions about what the movie is about or what will happen, just go in to be blown away. This is the way to see 300. 300 is a fantastic movie that takes cinematography to another level. The action sequences alone are a reason to see this movie, but it also has good acting with a relatively unknown cast, and the story line is one that has not been told.

Frank Miller who wrote and directed Sin City writes another great graphic novel that gets turned into a historic movie. Zack Snyder (Dawn Of The Dead 2004) directs and is one of the main screenwriters for 300. Snyder’s sense for detail and visual effects makes him so unique as a director, that if you see his movie you will know he directed it. The cast of 300 has no major star to speak of and for that reason is what makes such a fantastic movie. Gerard Butler (Reign Of Fire) assumes the role of King Leonidas, the king who with his life will defend his people and his country. Butler taking the lead role does a very good job showing that he can be the man in the front of a movie. The Queen Gorgo is played by Lena Headey (The Brothers Grimm). Headey steps up in this role to play a very convincing and confident queen. Dominic West (Mona Lisa Smile) takes the role of politician Theron, who clashes with the king and queen and also has his own hidden agenda. Two more unknowns in this movie are David Wenham and Vincent Regan. Wenham (who played Faramir in The Lord Of The Rings trilogy) plays Dilios, a warrior of Sparta, and Regan (who played Eudorus in Troy, Achilles’’ right hand man) takes another role as the right hand man of King Leonidas, as Captain.

300 begins to tell the story of how all Spartans are made to be perfect and to assure this they are inspected at birth and if there are any defects the children are discarded. Then comes the story of the young Spartan boys who are trained from the time they can stand to fight and never surrender. In this story comes the tale of a boy who defied all odds and became King Leonidas. 300 is the story of how the Persians with their millions attempt to take over the Spartans and take control of Greece. A Persian messenger is dispatched to persuade King Leonidas to surrender his land and give rule to Xerxes, the self-proclaimed God-King of the world, approaches Leonidas. Leonidas defies all rules set forth by earlier men and goes to war against Xerxes with only 300 warriors. His Queen Gorgo gives Leonidas the advice “Come back with your shield…Or on it.”

300 is an epic movie that portrays the war that was fought in Battle of Thermopylae in 480 B.C. This movie shows the heart of a king and the soul of a warrior. This is not a typical epic movie where the king sits back and lets his warriors fight, Leonidas is the front man of these 300 warriors, which is also what makes this a movie to watch over and over.

300 gets a 4.90 out of 5

This is a MUST SEE IN THE THEATER and it is a must have on DVD. I can only imagine what the extra features will be like.

The Departed

Sitting down to watch a movie with your girlfriend’s parents, what should one pick to watch? Being the fact that both parents are cops the obvious choice is The Departed. As for the rest of you who don’t have that luxury The Departed is still the movie to choose. The Departed is a cop and mob movie with ties to each side and who finds the rat first is the winner.

Martin Scorsese (Goodfellas) directs The Departed with his style that is second to none in bringing a script to life and making it stay with you. Scorsese takes this star-studded cast and blends them together and makes The Departed a masterpiece of a movie. All ego’s aside is how this cast seemed to come together with Jack Nicholson (Batman) taking the lead role as mobster Frank Costello. Matt Damon (Good Will Hunting), Leonardo DiCaprio (What’s Eating Gilbert Grape), Mark Wahlberg (The Italian Job), Martin Sheen (Apocalypse Now), Alec Baldwin (The Hunt For Red October), Anthony Anderson (Malibu’s Most Wanted) and James Badge Dale (24: Day 3) round out the cast of heavy hitters.

The story takes place in South Boston where Costello (Nicholson) befriends young Colin Sullivan and proceeds to take care of the young boy. Sullivan (Damon) grows up to become a trooper for the state of Massachusetts, but still has ties to mobster Costello. At the same time Billy Costigan (DiCaprio) is going through the academy to become a trooper as well, although he is given the option by Queenan (Sheen) and Dignam (Wahlberg) to become an undercover agent and try and infiltrate Costello’s operation. Sullivan has no idea that this is happening since his captain Ellerby (Baldwin) is not part of the undercover operatives names. What ensues next is see which side can do their job without getting smoked out as a rat.
The Departed has a lot of action that would make Goodfellas jealous. With the mind games and shady unhanding corruption of police forces makes The Departed a movie worth getting into. Unlike Donnie Brasco, which only a select few knew about the situation, The Departed shows how the police force has rats all through it and not just in front of your face. When a movie makes someone “Oh My God I Did Not See That Coming” that is the declaration of a landmark movie.

The Departed gets a 4.60 out of 5.

It won the Oscar for Best Picture 2007 and Best Director 2007 so it must be worth something…. Right?

The Departed is a must own.

Lucky Number Slevin

In an era where it seems that all movies are doing is making the same thing over and over or sequel after sequel out steps Lucky Number Slevin. Lucky Number Slevin is one of the best movies I have had the pleasure of watching. With such a star studded cast most would think that Slevin would not be as good as it is. This movie keeps you on the edge of your seat and keeps you guessing at what will happen next.

Directed by Paul McGuigan (Wicker Park) who brings his choppy, quick to the punch style to this movie and is what really makes Lucky Number Slevin stand out from the rest. Josh Hartnett (40 Days & 40 Nights) takes the lead role as the wrong person in the wrong place and is confused for his friend Nick Fisher. Fisher happens to owe a lot of money to The Boss, played by Morgan Freeman (Deep Impact), and The Rabbi, played by Sir Ben Kingsley (Ghandi). Bruce Willis plays Mr. Goodkat, an assassin who is making Fisher make the hits that Goodkat will then get payed for. The name dropping doesn’t stop there, Lucy Lui (Kill Bill Vol. 1) plays the neighbor of Fisher who is very determined to find out what is going on, Stanley Tucci (Big Trouble) plays police chief Brikowski. And Mykelti Williamson (Forrest Gump) plays a dimwitted thug that works for The Boss.

As the movie begins in an airport a man in a wheelchair tells a young man about a Kansas City Shuffle, a fixed horse race back in 1979 that resulted in a family’s untimely death. In New York Hartnett’s character is mistaken for his friend Nick Fisher. Since noone knows what Fisher looks like everyone assumes that Harnett is Fisher. He is then taken before two mob bosses that are in the middle of a war with each other. Since Fisher owes money to both sides, he is set up by Mr. Goodkat (Willis) who is hired to kill the son of The Rabbi (Kingsley) by The Boss (Freeman) who believes that his son was killed by The Rabbi’s faction. The accussed Fisher is trying to prove he is not who he says he is but has to go along with the ordeal because his life depends on it.

Lucky Number Slevin has many twists and many more turns that will have you trying to figure things out from the first minute of the movie, but what you don’t get is that what you think will happen either has already happened or you were thinking the wrong way. With Slevin you will find yourself talking about how good this movie was shot and portrayed. This is definitely a movie that will stick with you and make you want to watch it more than once.

Lucky Number Slevin gets a 4.25 out of 5.

This movie is definitely a MUST OWN, even if you don’t like movies you will love this movie.

Saw III

To make a trilogy there must be III. Saw has finally made its trilogy, with its latest installment of Saw III. Just like it’s predeceors Saw and Saw II , III comes with more gore and more plot twist that make one think “Where the hell did they come up with this?”

Darren Lynn Bousman (Saw II) takes the directing reigns again in Saw III. Bousman takes us into the twisted world of “what will you do to survive.” With all of the original cast since the beginning, Bousman leaves nothing to the imagination and just shows what is in the head of Jigsaw. Torbin Bell dons the robe again as Jigsaw, the insane genius who pushes your will to the breaking point and sees if you will past it. His partner in crime is Amanda, played again by Shawnee Smith, shows us why Jigsaw picked her as his successor in Saw II. Newcomers Angus Macfayden and Bahar Soomekn play the new games that Jigsaw and Amanda have up their sleeves. Donnie Walhberg and Dina Meyer also reprise their roles from Saw II.

“I want to play a game.” That is the reoccurring theme in all of the Saw trilogy. The only thing is that all three movies are basically the same, just with new torture devices. Saw III is set up to be the final chapter, as all finals go there is that window that could lead to a Saw IV.

I cannot really go into a plot scenario with Saw III without hitting all of the twist and turns that the movie brings. I can say that just as you thought it was this way think again, this is Jigsaw who tells you upfront what to do and puts it in plain English for you, its just the way its interpreted that makes the difference. The gore and devices used in Saw III will make anyone cringe and jump saying “Oh My God.”

As with Saw II, Saw III brings the whole story of the original into perspective and shows what was not told in either of the first two movies.

I give this movie a 2.75 out of 5 (Because it is the same movie just redone a different way)

The movie is not a rental or a buyer, Borrow it from somebody who was stupid enough to pay full price for it.

The Illusionist

For those who loved to be amazed by the elusive world of magic The Illusionist takes it to the next level. In the way magicians keep their audiences on the edges of their seats so does The Illusionist. Based in Vienna in the early 1900's The Illusionist is a story of a poor young lad and his assent in the great world of magic.

Director Neil Burger uses the dark age of magic and puts that into shooting this film. Burger tackled a hard job in capturing the essence of a magician in a time when magic was roughly and unknown act. Edward Norton stars as Eisenheim, a world traveled magician who's magic compares to none other. Paul Giamatti plays Inspector Uhl, the police chief put in charge to find out how Eisenheim performs his magic. Rufus Sewell stars as Prince Leopold, who after being shown-up by Eisenheim trys to drive him out of business. What would a movie be without a leading lady? Jessica Biel tackles the roll of Sophie, a childhood friend of Eisenheim.

The story starts with Eisenheim as a grown man performing magic, but then are taken back to his humble beginnings as the son of a carpenter. Eisenheim befriends Sophie and the two are forced to be separted, which in turn drives the young man out of the country. The story comes back 15 years later and Eisenheim returns as a powerful magician with tricks that noone has ever seen. After clashing with the prince and the murder of his childhood friend, Eisenheim is forced to go to desperate measures to show the world who the prince really is.

The Illusionist has many twists and turns that just like a magic show has people guessing "How'd he do that?" The magic tricks are out of this world and it is amazing just how anyone could of thought these up. Norton does do most of his own magic tricks in the movie. Though The Illusionist seems like it should be a suspense/thriller which it is, there is just a little Romeo and Juliet underlining to it.

The Illusionist gets a 3 out of 5.

This is rental, but the magic tricks are definitely a must own.

The Good Shepard

One of the most covert orgainizations in America finally has roots, be them true or not. The Good Shepard portrays the early makings of the CIA from humble beginings and influences of power. Directed by Robert De Niro (A Bronx Tale), who also has a role as one of the founders of the CIA, takes aim at showing people how and why the CIA was formed.

Matt Damon takes the lead in this movie as we follow his character throughout his life as a college "skull and bones" society member, being used by the FBI to bring down a nazi teacher, to being recruited by the military as an intellegence officer, then becoming a staple and founder of the intellegence section of the CIA. Damon's wife is played by Angelina Jolie (who Damon said was like kissing his sister). The Good Shepard also stars William Hurt (A History Of Violence), Billy Crudup (Without Limits, MI: 3), Alec Baldwin (The Cat In The Hat) and Joe Pesci (Goodfellas).

In the style of the godfather movies The Good Shepard has the audience listening and observing all aspects of the movie to be used in later on. From the Bay of Pigs disaster to the Cold War De Niro shows how all of the events that bought the CIA into life were all linked together by just a handful of people and stopped by just as many people. Damon's character Edward Wilson inhabits a world of betrayal and secrecies only enhancing the irony of the biblical quote inscribed on the CIA's wall- "And ye shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free". While we are given a glimpse into the life of a younger, more vital Wilson, the world he occupies creates the characteristically stolid, humorless man we come to know. A silently haunting Matt Damon carries the film on his shoulders. Edward Wilson is completely introverted and while Damon internalizes his thoughts, some of the films greatest moments are when emotion unknowingly pours out of Wilson through a mere flicker in his eyes.

Altough the movie runs over three hours The Good Shepard engages its audience throughout. With all Shepard has to explain and link there is no possible way to not have it this long.

Despite the length and to some people a dull form of shooting this film it is worth buying a ticket and seeing it in the movie theater.

The Good Shepard gets a 3.5 out of 5.

This is a must own for all fans of De Niro and/or the Godfather and for everyone else.

Lady In The Water

Just when you thought it couldn't be done M.Night Shyamalan comes through with another movie, Lady In The Water. A bedtime story that Shyamalan was telling his daughters gets turned into a major motion picture. M. Night Shymalan brings his expertise in storytelling, yet again, and has characters to remember. Starring Paul Giamatti (Sideways, Big Fat Liar), and Byrce Dallas Howard (The Village), daughter of director Ron Howard. Shyamalan aslo takes a step out from behind the camera to make more that just a cameo.

As the movie begins Shyamalan takes his time in introducing characters and setting the scences. The movie takes place in an apartment complex. Giamatti plays an apartment manager that spots someone or thing swimming in the pool after hours. This someone happens to be Howard who plays a sea nymph from the blue world long forgotten. Howard is trying to get home, but is being stalked by fierce monsters lurking nearby determined to kill her. Giamatti then sets out to try and help her get home.

Lady In The Water is a well shot movie, in the style of Shyamalan, which makes the pictures tell the story and has the audience guessing at what happens next. It also has the typical twists and turns one would expect from only Shyamalan. The concept of making a bedtime story into a movie seems farfetched, but Lady In The Water turns out to be more than jut a bedtime story. It is a story of discovery and purpose and if the opportunity to make a difference is there will you take it, no matter how crazy it seems.

Lady In The Water is a 3.5 out of 5.

This is a rental/own.

(If you liked The Village this is a must own, if you didn't then its a rental)

What the reviews are

I will be reviewing mostly new release DVD's and movie that I see in the theater. I will also review any movie. I have a great knowledge of movies and they are my passion. I will be as unbiasis as I can be in order to give the best review. I will then grade the movie on a scale of 5 (5 being the best) and then give a recommendation for buying or renting. If anyone has any questions on my reviews feel free to reply or post a comment about it. I am open to all critizim and will not take anything to heart.

If you have any questions on any movie, and would like my opinion, please feel free to ask. I will also review any movie.